Gloomy Monday


It’s a typically grey, drizzly Bank Holiday Monday, and it’s a week today until I start my journalism course. I’m slightly terrified. I’ve never done anything 9-5 before, especially not entire weeks… especially not like 15 entire weeks. I think it’ll be good for me, insofar as it’ll prepare me for the real working world, which uni definitely hasn’t done. A 10-hour week hasn’t really got me ready for a real job, or taught me how to organise my time.

I did a bit of shorthand last night. That’s the thing really stressing me out; it’s not easy at all. I’m a bit worried I won’t be able to keep up.

To be honest I’m a bit distracted at the moment; various things have been going on in my life, and today marks three years since my grandma died after a long battle with cancer, Alzheimer’s and myriad other illnesses. It’s gone really quickly. And it’s also been two months since my beloved rabbit, Bonnie, was put down, after a tumour was found in her little body. And there are other things going on that are occupying my mind. I’m also feeling incredibly unmotivated when it comes to doing my uni work. I do about 50 words a day, and then congratulate myself with the rest of the day off. I’m bored of the essay topics, and I just can’t wait to start something where it’s not a chore and a slog to do the thing I love – write. I’m moving some of my things out of my house in London tomorrow, as I’ll be primarily based back in Brighton from now. I can’t say it’s been the best year for me at all, so I’m looking forward to a fresh start. Starting today, really. I need new inspiration and new experiences.

I think I might do a post soon about shorthand. It’ll be interesting to look back on it and see how I improve over the coming months. Also I don’t want to post anything this miserable and self-indulgent again. For now it’s back to the uni essay though. The quicker I get through these, the better, as far as I’m concerned.



3 Comments Add yours

  1. Suzy says:

    I was exactly the same as you when i started. I tried to teach myself in the run up to starting my course and it’s amazing how much easier it is when someone is teaching you. I won’t pretend it’s not intense and a pain in the ass but if you stick with it and do all the very dull practise each day you’ll do it.

    1. It feels like such a slog! How far did you get before you started your course? I’m not really sure how much to do – I’m at the stage where I can read it OK, but I’m struggling with dictation… I’ve got some of the stranger symbols memorised, and the odd rules like one outline for -ility etc., but I really don’t want to turn up and find that I’ve not done enough!

  2. Sia says:

    Love you always x

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